Silent Recollection
by CherubKatan
Summary: (One Shot) How can I summarize this. I was bored at work and this wouldn't stop bothering me. Ran is thinking about his life, his past.


            I don't own Weiß. That's a good enough disclaimer if I've ever seen a bad one?

Silent Recollection

            I am Weiß, a hunter of the night, a man who denies the black beasts, whom the laws cannot touch, their tomorrows. They find that their mortality comes to an end with one swift slice of my katana. I'm not morbid, but I find a certain thrill, a satisfaction, if you will, when I see my sword slide through the corruption that plagues the world. No one sees it though.

            What do they see then? That is an interesting question. I guess you can say that they see a cold, unemotional man who goes by a woman's name. That is Aya. My teammates also see another, Abyssinian, but then again there is little to no difference between the two. They are just two different names for the same mask.

            A mask, yes that is what it only is, of who I really am. A facade, I hide behind, so that no one can get too close to me. There has been too much pain in my life, from people I have been close to. I don't want any more pain.

            At times, I can hear the whispers of my coworkers. They say things about me when they think I can't hear them, I can though. There are times when what they say about me becomes so ridiculous  that I feel like laughing aloud, to prove to them that they don't know me as well as they think they do. At other times, I just feel like crying. I do neither. I've come to just ignore them.

            They believe they know me, but do they know that my real name is Fujimiya, Ran? That I was once the son of a prosperous banker? Do they even know that, that banker who was my father, was brutally killed? Killed by the man named Takatori, Reiji, who found his life ending by my blade? That my whole family was killed except for my sister who was in a state that one could almost consider death? I think not, yet they still judge me on how I act.

            They have no right to do that. I've been dubbed the "Ice Prince" or sometimes I'm called the "Snow King." Yohji and Ken find it hilarious  when one or the other calls me that or any other unflattering names they come up with impulsively. The only one who does stick up for me is Omi, although even he has to stop himself from laughing at the nicknames I have gathered.

            I sometimes wonder why those three stay in Kritiker as assassins. They should be somewhere else. I'll grudgingly admit that they are good at their job, but their temperament doesn't suit it at all.

            Ken is happy almost all the time. Nothing ever gets him down, except for that one time he found out that his best friend betrayed him. That boy is too naïve.

            Then there is Yohji. What isn't wrong with that man. He's lazy, never takes things seriously, and he flirts too much. I swear sex is constantly on his mind. I'm surprised that he hasn't caught any STD yet, or… has he?

            Now we turn to Omi… the youngest of us all and yet he's the one that has been with Kritiker the longest. He's the one that I worry about the most, though, I'll never tell him that. He's the one that still has a chance at life, unlike me, yet he chooses to remain here and fight along side of us.

            There are times when I even wonder about myself. About how I allowed myself to be pulled back into the killing again, I was free of it at one point. Then my sister was kidnapped, changing everything. Kritiker strung me along once by saying that she would be with a bunch of the victims during that mission, and almost like a fool, I fell into it. She wasn't there.

            Do you know how much I had to fight the urge to wrap my fingers around the man, named Botan's neck? To squeeze the breath out of him until he died in my hands? That's only the second time I've felt such a burning rage in me. I had been used, tricked into doing something for them. I will admit, I was partially at fault, I blinded myself to their lies with the hope of my sister actually being there. Sometimes I still feel the urge to kick myself for that.

            Then again at the same time Botan made me realize that I shouldn't do this just to get my sister back, but for everyone's sister, daughter, brother, the list goes on and on, but to put it simply for every innocent person out there.

            It's somewhat ironic though, how he finally made me realize it. It took him being shot repeatedly, to save my sorry ass, to have it sink into my thick head. There are times, though, when I find my resolve weakening. I fix that quickly. Call me a sentimental fool, I don't care, but whenever I feel that I'm going to loose my nerve. I make a paper airplane and I remember all the things he had said and done to me before he died. Doing that helps me see my goal even clearer than before.

            Therefore, here I am again with Weiß. My sister is awake again. Even though the doctors swore there was little to no chance of her waking up. I'm glad she's awake, yet I can't help but feel somewhat guilty now for all the atrocities that I had committed in her name. I know she forgives me for it, but still, I can see the sadness that lingers in her eyes for a few seconds before she puts on her own mask. I think seeing her wear a mask kills me little by little every time I see it on her.

            And now, I sit here under a bunch of shady trees, in a park. The sun is streaming down in little patches and I watch the clouds roll across the sky that is baby blue in color, while I muse over what has happened to me in my life. I dare not try to look ahead, I said once before that I don't believe in destiny. I still don't, so to look into the future, to try to second-guess it, is redundant. I just know that no matter what, the choices I make here are mine and mine alone to with as I will.

Author's notes: Where in the fucking, hell did this come from?! *looks at Brad*

Brad: Don't look at me I have no idea where that came from.

*sweat drops* lovely I write something at work and yet have no clue why or where it came from… are you sure you didn't do it Brad?

Brad: I'm positive.

*looks at him then sighs* Err, I don't know what to say about this… bye!


End file.
